DMV

I know everyone has had to deal with this department of your state in some way shape or form.  We all know the dreaded take a number and a seat and pray that they all don't decide to go on lunch break while you are there. So you get your number that is about 10 people away from breaking free of the prison you have gotten yourself into. You sit down and some old lady decides she needs to explain her whole life story of why she is there.

I always end up mad and getting the annoying cheerful lady who wants me to donate money. HELL THE FUCK O i am about to pay you 200 plus for some tags stop trying to get me to buy candy and other stupid crap i dont need.

I can only say suggest when going to the DMV bring a tent sleeping bag, a picnic basket and just make yourself at home cause anytime the workers there see a person there ass drags like no other.   Good luck!

Old Men!

I touched on the subject of older women but i have yet to touch on the subject of older men.  Yes men this is for you. I have noticed for you men that when you get older everything grows but your penis.  Ears take off, Nose grows to double its size, but your package seems to shrink.  Your balls decide they are no longer friends with your penis and start that slow decent to your knees.

You go through that mid life crises phrase in which you precede to buy a motorcycle or fast car and find a young 19 year old who thinks your loaded enough to grace you with her existence.  Its okay guys, we understand up to the younger woman part.  Go get an ear waxing trim your nose hairs, shave your face for petes sake the beard does not make you look 30, put on your old G suit and take your lady out and show her why she married you in the first place.

Getting Older!

Yes ladies its the always hush hush part of our life. The number climbs slowly like our panty line that slowly expands up towards our boobs and out to cover our butts. We never want to revel our true age once we hit that  brick wall of 40! Our birthdays stop coming our faces change unless your the few who think taking some fishing wire and some hooks and pulling your face back until it looks plastic will keep you looking in your 20s, but for most of us we take age with a graceful step.

Woman need to start owning up to your age.  Why do you think older men go for the younger ladies? Its because all we do it bitch and complain about how good they look how we wished we looked like that, so they start to think hmmm maybe they are better and then bam hes 50 with a 20 year old and your stuck still complaining about your age! Own up to your age ladies stop worrying about getting older EVERYONE gets older even that 20 year old will hit her wall. Put on a g-string a nice black dress get you a boob perker bra and show your man im older but sexy as hell!